If you’re in a hurry, do not come to Thailand. I have been staying in the land of smiles for almost 7 weeks. I’m totally over the top with the vacation from the world tour. It’s just absolutely beautiful here and after the India escapade, I needed a break .
So the world tour extension was decided by extreme idleness. Before spring 2013, I won’t see my homeland Germany. I am back to a travel time of 1 year (-;
In China, I will try to get aboard the 5 star cruise ship Diamond Princess. The luxury cruiser crosses the Pacific in 19 days with stopovers:
Beijing, China
Busan, South Korea
Vladivostok, Russia
Sapporo, Japan
Anchorage, Alaska
Vancouver, Canada
Greg will most likely cut short the world tour at this point. So for the pacific crossing, I am looking for a travel partner in the 2-cabin. The price is at 1200 EUR per person and decreases now every week in selling off.
1200 EUR is not exactly chicken feed, but a trans-Pacific flight also costs 600 EUR. If you subtract the flight costs, 32 EUR remain per day for 19 days all inclusive luxury on a fucking ocean liner!
In Germany, the thermometer displays -5 °C. With such a brass monkey weather, you prefer not to go outside.
In Thailand, the thermometer displays +35 °C. With such an animal heat, you prefer not to go outside.
So much about the similarities, but I don’t want to switch places. Of course, winter has its charms:
mulled wine
fireplace
gingerbread
skiing holiday
white Christmas
+35 °C in Thailand
But the winter mood rapidly fades away and the cold remains. Then, it’s only mid-January and the winter doesn’t take a half time break. Winter winters on:
cold
snow slush
darkness
slippery ice
grey in grey
I don’t mind coming out as a child of summer.
Winter, get lost!
Hot and hotter?
Just my cup of tea!
-5 °C in Germany
Pai is situated in the mountains in the north of Thailand. Here, the temperature drops to +15 °C at night. At home in Germany it is up to 20°C colder. That’s stupefying! I put on two sweaters and watch people in winter jackets.
We travelers are expecting an extended summer at the equator or on the other hemisphere. Just like Akka, the wild goose, we follow the sun.
All travelers? Supposedly there is a group traveling acyclically around the world:
7 useful facts about Khao San Road ถนนข้าวสาร:
(no declaration of love)
Useful fact Nr. 1
In the cafeteria of the University of Thammasat, there is good and inexpensive lunch with spectacular river views, from 15 baht.
Useful fact Nr. 2
There is good and cheap dinner at the Khao San Road end of the night market, from 25 baht. The nightmarket is located at Thanon Ratchini along the Khlong. There you can also find about anything, you can imagine …
Useful fact Nr. 3
You can find all the room rates for all hotels in Bangkok in a guidebook. It’s at the big tourist information at the river bridge Somdet. In February 2012, prices are starting from 100 baht per night.
Useful fact Nr. 4
Now, the yellow Krungsri bank also charges 150 baht fee on cash withdrawals. AEON Bank and Citybank remain free of fees:
you can find AEON ATMs in supermarkets, for example on Thanon Chakrabongse, from the Khao San Road on the right and right-hand
you can find Citybank ATMs in Citybank branches in the city
If you have a VISA card from DKB or comdirect, you can recclaim any withdrawal fees.
Useful fact Nr. 5
You shouldn’t keep any drugs in your pocket on Khao San Road. Greg and I have been searched through by the police independently at different places in Bangkok. This was the first police check on the trip around the world.
Useful fact Nr. 6
The following busses go to Khao San road: 2: Central World, Sukhumvit (24 hours Bus!) 3: Weekend Market 6 15: Central World, Silom, Saphan Taksin 30 32 42 53: Chinatown, Hua Lamphong Railway Station 64: 65 79: Central World 82: Wong Wian Yai Railway Station 509: Weekend Market, Northeastern Bus Terminal 511: Central World, Sukhumvit 516: Southern Bus Terminal 524: Weekend Market
7-8 Baht per ride
This is my own little cheatsheet, no claim for completeness or consistency. Effective 02/2012, source: Transit Bangkok
Useful fact Nr. 7
If the bus sounds too stressful for you, the easiest and most beautiful way to town is with the
Chao Phraya Express boat on the river: from the pier behind the monastery, until 7pm, 15 baht
Khlong boat on the Saen Saeb canal, from the fort behind the Democracy Monument, until 8:30pm, 10 baht
I enjoy writing about useless facts to express my love for a place. Today I write about useful facts, to express my mixed feelings about Khao San Road.
And let’s face it, most Khao San folks are in great need of useful advice! On the other hand, very few backpackers here are on a budget. They really spoil the prices …
I was in Bangkok for 2 weeks. Time flew by, but I finally have to leave for:
A young monk peeps after a hooker on the Khao San Road backpacker road. Then he moves on, with his rice bowl.
Buddhist monks make a daily alms run in the public. Either they leave their ivory tower at dawn, or they have nothing to eat.
monk at an alms run
The monks at the monastery Chanasongkram in Bangkok must pass much tougher tests than the alms runs. The monastery is surrounded by Southeast Asia’s largest hotbed of sin, the party miles of Khao San Road.
At least the monks are safe from the shrewd Thai hookers. Each partygoer staggering home, however, is fair game. They will collect him, if possible. Many a backpacker already checked up close, if there are ladyboys among the streetwalkers.
party mile Khao San road
Khao San road never sleeps, but at 5:30 am, it is taking a nap. Most pubs are deserted. Like out of defiance, some party-goers at the Khao Sarn Center chant to “I Will Survive” at full volume.
At the end of Khao San, it is getting more quiet. A Thai asks me:
Do you speak French?
In India, I would have to ignore him silently. I would otherwise encourage him to try himself out on me. In Thailand, I can be polite:
I do not speak French!
(frz: This is not a pipe) strange loop at Magritte's 'The Treachery of Images'
The trick is, that we both spoke in French.
A lie?
The Cretan Epimenides once said:
All Cretans are liars
Is Epimenides’ statement true or false?
What about this statement:
This statement is false
The statement is:
not false
not true
It is a statement that
is self-referential, a strange loop
is undecidable, an Epimenides paradox
strange loop at Escher's 'Drawing Hands'
Before 1931, the world of mathematics was in order. Then Kurt Gödel used a strange loop on mathematical systems. Since then, we know that a formal mathematical system is either
incomplete or
contains statements that are undecidable.
That was a really bad shock for the mathematicians of that time. The bigger shock would have been, if it had been up to the mathematicians point of view. Then mathematicians wouldn’t exist, and neither would any other people.
good catch at the alms run
Strange loops are a main theme in the book Gödel, Escher, Bach (GEB). It’s also about music, painting, mathematics, (artificial) intelligence, consciousness and Zen.
A GEB read-through group just tackles the book of books at Reddit. We are only at the 3rd Chapter. It’s never too late to join us.
According to GEB, the most important question in Zen concerns the founder of Zen, the monk Bodhidharma:
Why did the monk Bodhidharma come to China from India?
In Zen, they tell you to “unask” this question, because it supposedly makes no sense. Life is easy in Zen…
This is not about Khao San or drinking or fucking. This is about you and the problem of induction.
Have you listened to old Kant and made your maxim universalizable? Good for you. But that doesn’t mean that your maxim is universal.
That doesn’t mean anything at all for your maxim! You’ve got no right to your categorical imperative or hypothetical imperative or whatever.
You put me in front of your favorite food and wonder why I spit it at your feet. Your goddamn favorite food has too little salt for me, or too much! It is too spicy or too bland for me!
Maybe I’m allergic to your favorite food.
And sometimes it is obviously poisoned.
Goddamnit, there are people who disagree!
That’s not me, that’s not for me!
Scheisse!
[...] but I never felt that one other person could enter that room and cure what was bothering me…or that any number of people could enter that room.
In other words, loneliness is something I’ve never been bothered with because I’ve always had this terrible itch for solitude.
It’s being at a party, or at a stadium full of people cheering for something, that I might feel loneliness.
7 useless facts about Hampi ಹಂಪ
(A declaration of love)
Useless fact Nr. 1
The Monkey Temple at Hampi Island is always in view.
Useless fact Nr. 2
On Hampi Island, there are meat, beers and hippies.
In Hampi Bazaar, there are pure veg, banana lassis and pilgrims.
Useless fact Nr. 3
Hampi Island is really an island
Useless fact Nr. 4
You should not miss the last boat across the Tungabhadra river in the evening . Otherwise you are stuck on the wrong side of Hampi. Or you have to take a coral boat for 10 times the normal price.
Useless fact Nr. 5
You can get whole banana plants.
Useless fact Nr. 6
The sunset place is very popular.
Useless fact Nr. 7
Everywhere, there are magnificent ruins of an ancient Hindu civilization.
I promised, that even in India, there are places like brilliant diamonds:
Hampi, Karnataka
Varanasi, Uttar Pradesch
Darjeeling, West Bengal
Puri, Odessa
Mysore, Karnataka
Hampi is actually not in India but in hippie rock-climbing country. There you can also find Fountainebleau (France), Yangshuo (China) and Tonsai Beach (Thailand).
My world travel buddy Greg spent a whole month in Hampi. Whether he stayed because of the hippies or the climbers, I do not know (-;
India doesn’t let me go, but now I’ve blogged enough about it…
The sidewalk is a mountain of garbage, besides the sewage?
The traffic noise is unbearable, it’s death by exhaust fumes?
The room is filthy, there is no running water?
People don’t leave you alone and sell for tourist prices?
What has annoyed me earlier, is now well below my threshold of tolerance.
I have been to India!
Translated for India virgins:
I have experienced the shitty misery
Traffic? Which traffic? - Mensch, ärgere dich nicht!
Nothing throws me off track so easily anymore. But this is only true outside of India. In India itself, I’m always with one foot in the abyss of a nervous breakdown. And the occasions for stumbling and falling in the vast country are many:
When I think, nothing can shock me anymore, then a Hindu mobile drives by noisily. In the front sits the guru and in the back stands a “particularly” sacred cow on 2 front legs and 4 hind legs. Both udders dangle through the turn.
When I think, even India has become part of everyday life, then my path in the narrow lanes of Varanasi is blocked by a cow. When squeezing by, it turns out that she’s also afraid of me. She pisses on my shoe, with great pressure.
Cow in Varanasi
When I think, I am well composed, then a dirty teenager jumps me in the street, clutching me. I loose my composure, throw him to the ground, run away. First, I am angry at the Indian, then at myself. How can you lose your composure?
He has not lost his composure. He embraced me from human to human, because I have refused him a handshake earlier. After all, he has a right to my hand shake, to my opinion, to my time. He knows no privacy, no silence, no No.
I am the foreigner, and my attention belongs to the 1.2 billion Indians!
We want your attention!
India, my India!
You broke my heart.
My anticipation for you was very high, despite all the stories. But you had other plans. After a few days I only wanted to get away from you. Was it my fault?
The 4 friends of India, who recommended me to visit, were supposed to help me by email from Germany:
gives me a list of ashrams for meditation
had booked a beach holiday in the hotel
tells me where I get hash
is a vegetarian
India, my India!
Are you only suitable for the spiritual, the beach vacationers, the potheads and the granivores?
Beach vacation in India, is possible without seeing any Indians
India is definitely not for me. Or is it, perhaps?
I wanted to have challenging experiences?
I wanted to get out of my comfort zone?
I wanted to see the world in its entirety?
On the subcontinent the world rears its ugly head.
The ugliness of human nature is always in the spotlight, too:
shoving, yelling, pissing, shitting
superstition, illiteracy, lack of motivation, poverty
That’s what I wanted to see. Or isn’t it, perhaps?
Homeless family in Mumbai
77% of Indians get along with 20 rupees a day (30 euro cents). Never mind. Indians stand above external circumstances. In the largest democracy, they watch with equanimity the decline of the world from the roadside. After all, nothing is forever, most certainly not in India.
In Asia’s largest slum, in Mumbai, I ask an Indian for directions to the slum. How do I know, that I am already right in the middle of the Dharavi slum? This shit hole is no different than the other shit holes, I have passed through for 2 months.
The whole damn country is a shit hole, with very few exceptions.
Dharavi slum in Mumbai
Of course there is also beauty in India, but you have to look hard for it. India is a website littered with advertising:
crowded
gaudy
unclean
attention-craving
5% signal, 95% noise
Even on a *blink blink* advertising page, you sometimes find a sparkling gold piece, rarely even a brilliant diamond. But the search is no fun. And trying to understand India is even less fun.
It’s endlessly hopeless!
Everything is public, nothing is ever private
For 4 weeks, I have been struggling for words to describe India. But India defies description. When someone rambles about India, as I do now, then let him go on rambling and think nothing of it.
